Alteration vs. Conservation Defined

[frankbmd]

Inmate Abbott: “Hey Lou, what are you in for?

Inmate Costello: “Restoring cardboard, Bud”

Bud: “You work for Waste Management?”

Lou: “Naw, a smaller outfit up in Oregon.”

Bud: “Oh, and what does the outfit do with the cardboard?”

Lou: “They sell it......... to investors.”

Bud: “What type of idiot invests in cardboard?”

Lou: “You’ld be surprised. Big money involved.”

Bud: “Where does the cardboard come from that you restore?”

Lou: “I have to buy it, sometimes from the outfit in Oregon.”

Bud: “And they buy it back?”

Lou: “No, Bud, they sell it.”

Bud: “To you?”

Lou: “No, to the investors”

Bud: “They ship the restored cardboard to the investors then.”

Lou: “Wrong again, Bud, they put it in a vault.”

Bud: “Then how do they protect the restored cardboard in the vault?”

Lou: “They keep it in small plastic cases.”

Bud: “So how did you get paid?”

Lou: “Bud, I cut the cardboard in exchange for a cut of the resale profit.”

Bud: “Fair enough, sort of an eye for an eye type deal. So why are you in jail? Is cutting cardboard illegal?

Lou: “It depends, Bud. The outfit in Oregon stated in court that cutting to conserve was okay, but that cutting to alter was not.”

Bud: “But you said you were in for restoring cardboard. Isn’t that conservation?

Lou: “Go online and look at the evidence: one man’s conservation is another man’s alteration. There is not a clear cut difference, so to speak.”

Bud: “Gee, that’s terrible, Lou.”

Lou: “Yeah, 20 years is a stiff sentence for altering cardboard. By the way, Bud, what are you in for?

Bud: “Certifying cardboard and putting it in plastic cases.”

—————- to be continued ————