Sold My Collection - Not About Me - Please Read

[SyrNy1960]

(Formerly 3arod13)

After 45+ years of collecting, I recently sold my entire sports memorabilia collection, except my 2005 Alex Rodriguez Game Used Fielding Glove, which was a gift from my wife. I have my final piece being sold in Heritage Auctions 16-18 November 2023. My focus has shifted.

My wife was recently diagnosed with Alzheimer’s Disease. In 2021, while she was retired and I was still working, she was noticing issues with her memory, but figured it was just due to her age (69); like most of us do. She would get frustrated and cry alone at times, while I was at work, and she was keeping this from me. Just before I retired, I came home from work one day and found her in the kitchen crying. I hugged her and asked her what was wrong. She told me that she was looking for her mother’s sewing kit all day and can’t remember where it is. It has been in the same place since we moved to our home in 1999 (22 years). At this point, she still didn’t tell me she has been having problems with her memory for the past year.

After I retired in February 2022, and because I was home with her every day, I started noticing issues with her memory. Mostly short-term memory. I talked to her Neurologist, who she was seeing for nerve and muscle pain in her legs, and he ordered a brain scan. This is when we found out she has Alzheimer's Disease. He put her on two medications, that are supposed to help slow down the progression of the disease: Donepezil (10 mg) and Memantine (10 mg). I wish my wife would have told me back in 2021, so we could have got her checked out and on this medication much sooner.

My point to this post is awareness. Those of us who are of older age, we tend to blow off memory issues to just being part of getting older. Please, if anyone in your family has a family history of Dementia or Alzheimer's Disease, or you notice significant changes in their memory, please have them get checked out. The sooner they get on medication, the better chance they have to slow down its progression. It is an awful disease, with no current cure.

My focus and priority are my wife’s happiness and quality of life.

Thanks, Tony

[Scott6043]

Prayers sent for you and your wife.

[Hxcmilkshake]

Prayers for you and your wife, thanks for posting

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[milkit1]

Thank you for sharing. Prayers and all good wishes

[SyrNy1960]

Scott, Stan, and Sean,

Thank you very much! As I'm sure others feel the same, no need to post. My sole purpose was awareness. Thanks!

[jason.1969]

Really important post. We took too long to see this happening with my father-in-law. Best wishes to you and your wife.

[SyrNy1960]

Originally Posted by jason.1969

Really important post. We took too long to see this happening with my father-in-law. Best wishes to you and your wife.

Jason,

Thanks! I agree! Most of us just assume memory issues are part of getting old. And as we get older, we are sometimes in denial of the changes we are going through, so we ignore them. Getting diagnosed early and getting on the medication is key.

[batsballsbases]

Tony,
So sorry you are going thru this.. A very good friend of mine down here in NC is going thru the same thing with his wife... about the same age. Thoughts and Prayers sent your way ... Try and take out older photos show them to her... anything to try and stimulate thought in her mind.... keep up the fight

[SyrNy1960]

Originally Posted by batsballsbases

Tony,
So sorry you are going thru this.. A very good friend of mine down here in NC is going thru the same thing with his wife... about the same age. Thoughts and Prayers sent your way ... Try and take out older photos show them to her... anything to try and stimulate thought in her mind.... keep up the fight

Al,

Sorry to hear that! Thoughts and prayers! Thanks for the advice and I will do that! Much appreciated! It's an awful disease. I have my breakdown moments alone, but don't let her see that. It's difficult to see someone you love struggle, no matter what the situation is.

[Scott Garner]

Tony,
So sorry to hear about your wife and thank you for this post.
My Mom, who is 88, has had dementia and Alzheimer's for about 6 years now and is late stage.
Alzheimer's is a very tough diagnosis for anyone that you love, but I certainly think that having this happen to your long-time spouse has to be about the toughest.

Thoughts and prayers for you and your family.

[conor912]

Originally Posted by SyrNy1960

I have my breakdown moments alone, but don't let her see that. It's difficult to see someone you love struggle, no matter what the situation is.

Make sure you are getting support for yourself, too! My stepfather has Alzheimers. He and my mom got married when I was young, so he’s like another dad to me. At this point I worry more about her than I do him. No one can do it alone. I wish you both the best!

[philo98]

Hey Tony sorry to hear the development with your wife. I dont want to get into too negative of things as you know the general progression of Alzheimer's, however, I remember when my grandmother had this and she had been married to my grandfather for 60+ years and they were childhood friends since they were toddlers. My grandfather adored her his entire life. One thing that helped was my grandmother had made index cards of how she felt towards my grandfather and had also made some for my father. Those index cards became life savers as the disease progressed and you know the reasons why. Im sorry you have to go through this experience.

[SyrNy1960]

Originally Posted by philo98

Hey Tony sorry to hear the development with your wife. I dont want to get into too negative of things as you know the general progression of Alzheimer's, however, I remember when my grandmother had this and she had been married to my grandfather for 60+ years and they were childhood friends since they were toddlers. My grandfather adored her his entire life. One thing that helped was my grandmother had made index cards of how she felt towards my grandfather and had also made some for my father. Those index cards became life savers as the disease progressed and you know the reasons why. Im sorry you have to go through this experience.

Ryan,

Thank you for sharing that with me! Brought tears to my eyes. My worst fear is when things progress. Right now, it's her short-term memory. She'll ask me 10 times a day, what day is this. Can't remember where she gets her hair done. One moment that really scared me is when our son told her on Monday that he and his wife were going to Seattle and would return on Friday. On Friday, I mentioned to her that they were returning today, and she didn't remember he even went. It took me a bit to jar her memory, but eventually she did. You're advice is great and I will do that! We do everything together and I keep her laughing and busy. I won't leave her side. We just celebrated our 30th Wedding Anniversary in February.

Tony

[ksfarmboy]

Tony prayers for your wife and your family.

[todeen]

Glad you have your priorities in line, you are an example to all of us. As my father always said, "you are a fine man Charlie Brown." Prayers to your wife and to you in support of her.

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[Kawika]

Stay strong, be steady.

[Robbie]

Be kind to yourself as you love and support your wife. My prayers are with you.

[michael3322]

Very moving Tony. Sending you and your family thoughts and prayers. Thanks for sharing.

[GrayGhost]

my best to you and your wife in these hard times. must be so hard, but boy it couldn't be any more worth it. God Bless

[jbsports33]

Thank for sharing - great post about awareness and understanding - my wife’s grandfather had it and can be tough. Having family support is the best medicine - God Bless

Jimmy

[ALBB]

very very sorry to hear that

[NYYFan63]

Sending prayers to you and your wife Tony…


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[Kingcobb]

Prayers for you and your wife. My mother had this in 2013 to 2016 and it was heart breaking to say the least.

[Eggoman]

Hey Tony - I feel your pain as I went through Dementia with MY Mom who I lost 5 years ago and am re-living it now with my Mom-in-Law who has ALZ...

There is A TON of GREAT advice here - re-living her STRONG & HAPPY memories, pictures, take her to her old haunts and neighborhoods, Estate Planning, etc.

The long and the short of it is that ALZ sucks! It is an awful thing and at the moment - there IS "no better"...

Besides my best to you and your family, all I can offer is the title of a GREAT book on the subject entitled "The 36-hour Day." It is considered by many to be a Bible of sorts on the subject.

I got A LOT of help and ideas from it.

Stay Strong & Healthy - she needs you as her ROCK!

[SyrNy1960]

Originally Posted by Eggoman

Hey Tony - I feel your pain as I went through Dementia with MY Mom who I lost 5 years ago and am re-living it now with my Mom-in-Law who has ALZ...

There is A TON of GREAT advice here - re-living her STRONG & HAPPY memories, pictures, take her to her old haunts and neighborhoods, Estate Planning, etc.

The long and the short of it is that ALZ sucks! It is an awful thing and at the moment - there IS "no better"...

Besides my best to you and your family, all I can offer is the title of a GREAT book on the subject entitled "The 36-hour Day." It is considered by many to be a Bible of sorts on the subject.

I got A LOT of help and ideas from it.

Stay Strong & Healthy - she needs you as her ROCK!

Greg,

Thanks! I just ordered the book.

Tony

[ajjohnsonsoxfan]

Originally Posted by Eggoman

Hey Tony - I feel your pain as I went through Dementia with MY Mom who I lost 5 years ago and am re-living it now with my Mom-in-Law who has ALZ...

There is A TON of GREAT advice here - re-living her STRONG & HAPPY memories, pictures, take her to her old haunts and neighborhoods, Estate Planning, etc.

The long and the short of it is that ALZ sucks! It is an awful thing and at the moment - there IS "no better"...

Besides my best to you and your family, all I can offer is the title of a GREAT book on the subject entitled "The 36-hour Day." It is considered by many to be a Bible of sorts on the subject.

I got A LOT of help and ideas from it.

Stay Strong & Healthy - she needs you as her ROCK!

Tony thanks for your post and will be pulling for you and your wife. And Greg just ordered the book, thanks for the recommendation. My Dad was recently diagnosed and just went on the meds. Will share book with my Mom who is primary caregiver.

[parkplace33]

Prayers to you and your family during this time.