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#27
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![]() SOLDIER #1: Where'd you get the coconut? ARTHUR: We found them. SOLDIER #1: Found them? In Virginia? The coconut's tropical! ARTHUR: What do you mean? SOLDIER #1: Well, this is a temperate zone. ARTHUR: The swallow may fly south with the sun or the house martin or the plumber may seek warmer climes in winter yet these are not strangers to our land. SOLDIER #1: Are you suggesting coconuts migrate? ARTHUR: Not at all, they could be carried. SOLDIER #1: What -- a swallow carrying a coconut? ARTHUR: It could grip it by the husk! SOLDIER #1: It's not a question of where he grips it! It's a simple question of weight ratios! A five ounce bird could not carry a 1 pound coconut. ARTHUR: Well, it doesn't matter. Will you go and tell your master that the baseball card collectors are here. SOLDIER #1: Listen, in order to maintain air-speed velocity, a swallow needs to beat its wings 43 times every second, right? ARTHUR: Please! SOLDIER #1: Am I right? ARTHUR: I'm not interested! SOLDIER #2: It could be carried by an African swallow! SOLDIER #1: Oh, yeah, an African swallow maybe, but not a European swallow. That's my point. SOLDIER #2: Oh, yeah, I agree with that. ARTHUR: Will you ask your master if he wants to join our trading group?! SOLDIER #1: But then of course, uh, African swallows are non-migratory. SOLDIER #2: Oh, yeah. SOLDIER #1: So, they couldn't bring a coconut back anyway.
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