It sounds like you guys confused the sh!t out of each other... I wouldn't necessarily blame you or the seller for this mess. Those kinds of lots can create a bit of a mess just staying in the US, but once the South Africa thing came into play, it seems as though it made an even bigger mess. Not to mention different paypal accounts, addresses,, relays in shipping, so on and so on...
As long as he refunds you, I probably wouldn't blast him with negatives.. It sound like he's confused, you're confused, hell, even we're a bit confused. I'd probably give him a pass for the way things went, so long as tries to make it right.
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