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MattShawn - that's a good idea - the listing is down, but I do have emails from the seller with the scans.
Josh - sorry I wasn't clear in my initial post. It would be great if the CC company would take delivery conf as proof of return, but they are letting Paypal dictate the criterion here since they are viewing Paypal as a neutral party, and Paypal only recognizes signature confirmation, which wouldn't have happened in this case. I agree since I am their customer they should be on my side.
I think in the second case, I got messed over 3 times: once by the seller, once by a Paypal policy requiring signature confirmation which can easily be declined by a bad seller, and once by my CC company who took Paypals requirements as reasonable.