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Posted By: Jeff Lichtman

Rob, I'm deeply troubled by your inclusion of just one smiley face in your post. I've found that adding two smileys really does the job. Two mind you, no more, no less. I've now taken to employing smileys in all aspects of my life in order to defuse potentially tense situations. Why just the other day I cut off a driver on the Long Island Expressway and as he flipped me the bird and attempted to drive clear up the back of my car I pulled out two smileys -- and just like magic there were smiles sent right back at me. Close one. Yesterday I said an apparently very politically incorrect thing about Marion Jones on a radio show and as the producer of the show ran into the booth to chide me over the use of such bad words -- he was concerned my comment might trigger protests in front of the building -- I simply whipped out two smileys and just like that we were both singing Kumbaya.

Bottom line: no matter how idiotic or obnoxious one may be, two simple smileys will level out the playing field in no time.

<---- note smileys