17. I miss the days when broadcasts didn’t have to include extremely overly-qualified stats to try to invent a historic meaning for any on-field occurrence - “Constantine is the first switch-hitting player of Cypriot descent to ever reach first base both through an intentional walk and catcher’s interference in the same game.”
18. I miss the days when teams could actually plate runs when there were two runners in scoring position and no outs by any means other than hitting a home run.
19. I miss the days when you didn’t have to stressfully keep an eye on the ‘New Year’s Eve countdown clock’ on screen each time a pitcher was preparing to deliver the ball.
20. I miss the days when if their pitcher plunked our guy, the first guy up for their team - no matter who he was - would also immediately get plunked.
21. I miss the days when players actually used two hands to make a catch, and didn’t purposely try to make every catch look as stylishly nonchalant as possible.
22. I miss the days when betting on a baseball game meant meeting up with a guy named Benny in the smoke-filled back room of a deli in Queens, and not simply visiting the websites of all the MLB-promoted gambling concern ads plastered all over the stadiums and visible throughout the TV broadcasts.
And finally...
23. I miss the days when relievers didn’t come in with booming, stadium rock theme songs, but were casually driven to the mound in little BEEP! BEEP! buggies.
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