I am relatively young (40s) but have a wife and kids and have thought about this as well. I have a modest collection (sub 100k in value) but there is at least enough there that it is worth my wife's time to make sure that she doesn't get ripped off and that she maximizes what she and my kids get out of my collection, if for no other reason than to take a really nice vacation or get a new car out of the deal if I croak early. I have not only baseball cards, but some other collectibles that have only sentimental/collector value to me but have monetary value to others.
For my baseball cards, I have instructed my wife to talk to two of my friends who are also collectors, and who won't do anything to rip her off. They have agreed to help her dispose of the collection, and to help her achieve a fair market price for what is there. Much of my collection is unopened packs/boxes/cases, and so it is easy to move and will not pose a problem for disposal in fairly short order when I go.
For the collectibles, there are some items that are headed to a local museum. They are that rare, and need to be available for others to see. The rest of that body of assets have been viewed by another collector/former museum curator who knows their value and their rarity, and will be able to help my wife dispose of them in an appropriate way.
I think in this area, as in lots of other parts of life, it revolves around trust. You need to set up an appropriate outlet that will assist your heirs but one that you trust entirely to be fair not only due to their relationship with you, but out of respect for your heirs. No system is perfect, though, and undoubtedly someone will see their acquisition of your collection/items as a "find." That's not necessarily a bad thing. On the contrary, I would love to know that after I go, someone else would find as much happiness and amusement in the things I have enjoyed owning as I did.
kevin
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