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-   -   I hate doing this.. Help needed.. please read (http://www.net54baseball.com/showthread.php?t=172960)

bcookie 07-25-2013 08:50 AM

I hate doing this.. Help needed.. please read
 
Hello, I feel awkward posting this to strangers on a baseball card forum. As some of you may know my wife broke her wrist 2 months ago and has not been able to work and she is not bringing in any money. We have been ok over the past 8 weeks, but now everything has piled up. She will not be able to return to work for at least another month.

We are not even living check to check right now.,. my income pays the bills, but we need money for the food and essentials.. so I am finding myself delaying bills.. not a good thing.

I am not looking for handouts, I will be sending my baseball items out to all that can help. Baseball and collectibles are the least of my concerns right now.

I feel that $300 would get me back on track and we can last the next month or 2.

I do not have a list of what I am sending, but I will send to all that can help.

Leon, please remove this if you feel, I just do not know where to turn.

Thank you to everyone.

My paypal address is: bwcarc@live.com

Thanks,

Brian

Leon 07-25-2013 09:09 AM

It's a difficult situation you are in and I feel bad for you. In looking at your history of posting on this board I will hold my other comments for now. No, I don't think this is really the right place to ask for money though. I am sure there are plenty of our 4600 registered members that go through hard times and don't post about it. Good luck though...

chris6net 07-25-2013 09:21 AM

Brian, I have to agree with Leon. A lot of us go through tough times but this is a Vintage Baseball Card Forum. I wish you luck.

sycks22 07-25-2013 09:26 AM

I wish you luck in getting back on your feet Brian.

ThoseBackPages 07-25-2013 09:28 AM

Brian,

Definitely list your stuff on www.eBay.com

Good luck!

Sean1125 07-25-2013 09:36 AM

I'd be happy to buy some stuff... But no handouts... E-mail sent.

CharleyBrown 07-25-2013 09:43 AM

Hello Brian,

You might want to consider contacting your utilities, cable company, etc. and informing them of your situation. They may be willing to work with you on paying off some of your bills.

I'd also recommend looking to see where you can cut costs. Things like cable, cell phones, etc. can be more costly than we realize, and simply reducing packages, or eliminating them entirely can save 1-200 hundred/month.

Lastly, list what you have on eBay or here in the BST section. I am sure that there will be plenty of interest. On the other hand, one only needs to look at the CU forums to see that there have been cases of people taking advantage of others. I don't know you, so I can't say one way or the other, but people will most likely be wary of just blindly sending money.

I wish you the best of luck.

Shaun

bcookie 07-25-2013 09:48 AM

thanks guys for the comments... i have been cutting expences.. i just took off a car we do not use from my insurance.. $40 a month is $40 a month right.. i am in that stage where it looks like there is no light at the end of the tunnel

the-illini 07-25-2013 10:00 AM

I really hope things work out for you, but I don't think this belongs on the board and I honestly can't understand why it is still on here.

vintagetoppsguy 07-25-2013 10:05 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bcookie (Post 1162722)
thanks guys for the comments... i have been cutting expences.. i just took off a car we do not use from my insurance.. $40 a month is $40 a month right.. i am in that stage where it looks like there is no light at the end of the tunnel

Brian,

Good luck with your situation. If it's a car that you do not use, perhaps you should consider selling it. That might catch you up and tide you over for next month.

Cardboard Junkie 07-25-2013 10:05 AM

This is inappropriate on so many levels, I can't even begin.:(

Leon 07-25-2013 10:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by the-illini (Post 1162731)
I really hope things work out for you, but I don't think this belongs on the board and I honestly can't understand why it is still on here.

Well then I will tell you. Because I don't want to be seen as heartless. I did give my opinion on it though. Now you know.

insccollectibles 07-25-2013 10:29 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by the-illini (Post 1162731)
I really hope things work out for you, but I don't think this belongs on the board and I honestly can't understand why it is still on here.

I think its still here due to compassion. Its not the right place to post however please try to put yourself in their shoes. People do things they normally wouldn't when they are desperate.

Tao_Moko 07-25-2013 10:36 AM

Why not list on bst?
 
I bet if you put some fire sell pricing on bst that you'll move some product.

UOFLfan7 07-25-2013 10:38 AM

While I do not believe that this belongs on the board, I think that we should all keep in mind that last year another forum member accepted numerous donations while going through a tough time and nobody truly questioned it.

I feel that compassion is humanities greatest gift, and I just wanted to express my condolences for you and your family. I suggest selling some of your stuff on eBay if that's what you must do in order to make at least some income as that right now should be top priority.

Once again, I express my condolences. I am very wary about sending money to anybody I do not know, otherwise I would happily send some money your way. I'm not saying that you are going to take advantage of the situation like that, but you always have to be wary in today's America.

I hope all goes well for you and your family.

With Best Wishes,
Cameron

ullmandds 07-25-2013 10:40 AM

best of luck in getting past this tough time.

"While I do not believe that this belongs on the board, I think that we should all keep in mind that last year another forum member accepted numerous donations while going through a tough time and nobody truly questioned it."

When this person spent said $$$$ on bb cards it sure was questioned!?

the-illini 07-25-2013 10:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by UOFLfan7 (Post 1162749)
While I do not believe that this belongs on the board, I think that we should all keep in mind that last year another forum member accepted numerous donations while going through a tough time and nobody truly questioned it.

I feel that compassion is humanities greatest gift, and I just wanted to express my condolences for you and your family. I suggest selling some of your stuff on eBay if that's what you must do in order to make at least some income as that right now should be top priority.

Once again, I express my condolences. I am very wary about sending money to anybody I do not know, otherwise I would happily send some money your way. I'm not saying that you are going to take advantage of the situation like that, but you always have to be wary in today's America.

I hope all goes well for you and your family.

With Best Wishes,
Cameron

Much better said than what I wrote. I hope your situation improves, and soon.

UOFLfan7 07-25-2013 10:44 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ullmandds (Post 1162752)
best of luck in getting past this tough time.

"While I do not believe that this belongs on the board, I think that we should all keep in mind that last year another forum member accepted numerous donations while going through a tough time and nobody truly questioned it."

When this person spent said $$$$ on bb cards it sure was questioned!?

I left the board for a long hiatus during that time. I remember the donations, but I must have left before people found out that he/she spent the money on baseball cards. My bad.

Leon 07-25-2013 10:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by UOFLfan7 (Post 1162754)
I left the board for a long hiatus during that time. I remember the donations, but I must have left before people found out that he/she spent the money on baseball cards. My bad.

Just to set the record straight, the person those donations were collected for back then, didn't receive one cent from any member that I am aware of. (Though members might have sent him money directly, I am not aware of it)

The monies collected on the board were all put into a fund that I took up and 100% of it was sent to the funeral home. What he did with his own money was his business. That was a very difficult situation all the way around.

Rich Klein 07-25-2013 11:04 AM

I'm still in contact with that poster
 
I sent him some cards of his home town team and received back some nice emails. Things have improved emotionally for him, but that whole situation was hard on so many levels. Truly a situation of 50 shades of grey

Rich

P.S. Buy my items on BST -- that would be my National spending money -- look in the 1980-present baseball area :)

UOFLfan7 07-25-2013 11:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Leon (Post 1162759)
Just to set the record straight, the person those donations were collected for back then, didn't receive one cent from any member that I am aware of. (Though members might have sent him money directly, I am not aware of it)

The monies collected on the board were all put into a fund that I took up and 100% of it was sent to the funeral home. What he did with his own money was his business. That was a very difficult situation all the way around.

Thank you for setting it straight. As we all are aware memories can be very deceiving, and I've never had the greatest memory in the first place. Situations like this are always very difficult as it's in human nature to want to help others but at the same time there is alway risk involved and wary of what the person receiving the donations may or may not do with the money he/she receives.

Once again, thanks Leon for setting the record straight, and I am sorry if I offended anybody with my rather ignorant and very broad statement.

bcookie 07-25-2013 12:23 PM

the car i took the insurance off is a 1998 Buick Century with its second motor and about 160,000 miles on it.. we have thought of selling it but would only get a few hundred for it.. we were saving it to teach our oldest daughter how to drive later this year.

christopher.herman 07-25-2013 12:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bcookie (Post 1162705)
I do not have a list of what I am sending, but I will send to all that can help.

Put together a list of what you have on the B/S/T and I will commit right now to buy something. Until then, a detailed explanation of your situation is not necessary.

So far, all this post has generated for you is sympathy and pity and neither pay the bills.

I understand this sounds insensitive and heartless. I am, however, empathetic and I'm willing to contribute.

This board has been very good to me and I value my membership here.

I also value my own money, family and collection (not necessarily in that order) enough to not send it blindly over the internet.

Good luck,
Christopher.

brookdodger55 07-25-2013 01:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by christopher.herman (Post 1162804)
Put together a list of what you have on the B/S/T and I will commit right now to buy something. Until then, a detailed explanation of your situation is not necessary.

So far, all this post has generated for you is sympathy and pity and neither pay the bills.

I understand this sounds insensitive and heartless. I am, however, empathetic and I'm willing to contribute.

This board has been very good to me and I value my membership here.

I also value my own money, family and collection (not necessarily in that order) enough to not send it blindly over the internet.

Good luck,
Christopher.

I fully believe in helping others any chance I get, put up the cards and I would also purchase something to help you during this difficult time. I believe from your past post that this has been going on for some time. If you had put up your collection for sale with a short version of your situation earlier you would have gotten a more supportive response. Cards can always be replaced. If in the future you want you card back email me and i will send it back to you for half of what I paid for it. Win Win
Mike

vintagetoppsguy 07-25-2013 01:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by brookdodger55 (Post 1162817)
If in the future you want you card back email me and i will send it back to you for half of what I paid for it. Win Win
Mike

Can I get in on that deal? :D

Just kidding and very generous of you, Mike!

I, too, would buy something. As others have said, list your stuff on the B/S/T

ethicsprof 07-25-2013 01:16 PM

help needed
 
I am sorry that you are having difficult financial times.
Over the years, with the economy often out of sorts, several have
put up cards, etc. for sale in order to get through the difficult times.
I have seen them work hard day after day to sell cards,etc. and have done so with much effort, diligence, and concern for the buyer as well as themselves. Recently, I think of GrayGhost as one who day after day seeks
to offer what he can for sale to us on the board. I admire his efforts.
I would suggest to you that you do as others have suggested and put
your items up for sale at a fair price and go from there.
The 'grab bag' approach will not work well in this situation, I would think.
all the best to you,
barry

bcookie 07-25-2013 01:46 PM

i will post onthe BST board soon.. i just have to get everything together.. thanks again guys

Gobucsmagic74 07-25-2013 01:49 PM

Like others I completely sympathize with the hardship you and your family are currently enduring, but I don't understand or agree with asking for "donations" on a message board when it sounds like you may have cards/memorabilia that you can actually offer for sale either here or on ebay. If anything, do what a previous poster recommended and itemize what you have to sell, list whatever you have, and see what the items might bring. I wish you and your family the best...oh, and there is light at the end of the tunnel if your wife will be able to work in a month or so...so just hang on

4815162342 07-25-2013 02:04 PM

Praying for you
 
I'm praying for you. If not for God's grace, we would all be broke.

Philippians 4:11-13

travrosty 07-25-2013 02:08 PM

If your cup runneth over please help out your neighbor, 5 bucks to paypal, whats the risk? it's hard to ask and it takes humility. ask yourself if it is you next time and you feel like there is no other way what would you like the response to be?

the 'stache 07-25-2013 02:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by travrosty (Post 1162850)
If your cup runneth over please help out your neighbor, 5 bucks to paypal, whats the risk? it's hard to ask and it takes humility. ask yourself if it is you next time and you feel like there is no other way what would you like the response to be? 9 million people lost their jobs in this recession, the biggest recession in 75 years and as much as people are suppose to 'buck up' there are some who need help. I don't even know him but if you can just a few bucks would go a long way I would bet.

While I completely sympathize with your plight, Brian, I agree with the other members of the forum that this probably isn't the right place for this. But I also agree with Travis. There are a lot of people out there hurting right now. People that for one reason or another (completely beyond their control) have been put in a situation where they just don't know what to do, and they're at their wit's end.

My cup isn't exactly running over right now, but I've been fortunate enough to have some wonderful friends, and an incredible family that have helped me through a very difficult time over the last month. I count my blessings every day, and I know that if a few things went differently, I could be in a very different position.

Since coming here, some incredible people have been very kind to me, sending me a baseball card or two to help me get my collection started. They asked for nothing in return, doing so out of the goodness of their hearts. For that, I am grateful. They've used the expression "pay it forward", meaning that they are returning the kindness that was shown to them. So, I am going to do the same. I won't miss $10, but I hope that it gets Brian a little closer to where he needs to be. Maybe a few other forum members can do the same.

I am pulling for you and your family, Brian. God bless, and good luck!

Bill

bcookie 07-25-2013 02:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by travrosty (Post 1162850)
If your cup runneth over please help out your neighbor, 5 bucks to paypal, whats the risk? it's hard to ask and it takes humility. ask yourself if it is you next time and you feel like there is no other way what would you like the response to be?



Travis, thank you so much.



we all go through our hard time.. some more than once... i have had my fair share and have come out with my head up.

Rob D. 07-25-2013 03:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by UOFLfan7 (Post 1162770)
Thank you for setting it straight. As we all are aware memories can be very deceiving, and I've never had the greatest memory in the first place. Situations like this are always very difficult as it's in human nature to want to help others but at the same time there is alway risk involved and wary of what the person receiving the donations may or may not do with the money he/she receives.

Once again, thanks Leon for setting the record straight, and I am sorry if I offended anybody with my rather ignorant and very broad statement.

To set it perfectly straight, that member did indeed receive money from at least one person on the board.

thehoodedcoder 07-25-2013 03:25 PM

if you say what you have to sell rather than asking for money you may have gotten a better response. you asked for donations, then i will send you something if you help.

um. send what? how about you post what you have for sale, then put a price on it that is fair. from a real sale you could have had money in your pocket by now.

what do you have in the way of t206. im always buying.

kevin

botn 07-25-2013 03:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Leon (Post 1162759)
Just to set the record straight, the person those donations were collected for back then, didn't receive one cent from any member that I am aware of. (Though members might have sent him money directly, I am not aware of it)

The monies collected on the board were all put into a fund that I took up and 100% of it was sent to the funeral home. What he did with his own money was his business. That was a very difficult situation all the way around.

Well the person in question did not have to directly receive one cent but by the board paying for his obligation it allowed him to use "his" money to continue buying baseball cards instead of covering the obligation first. While I do not envy his circumstances, he was enriched by the board anyway you look at it.

CharleyBrown 07-25-2013 03:58 PM

Brian,

I'd be happy to throw some work your way if you or your wife are decent writers. As long as your wife doesn't mind typing with one hand, the broken wrist shouldn't hinder her from doing the work. The pay isn't tremendous, but it could help you cover at least some of the money you need without relying on donations.

Shaun

Leon 07-25-2013 04:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by botn (Post 1162894)
Well the person in question did not have to directly receive one cent but by the board paying for his obligation it allowed him to use "his" money to continue buying baseball cards instead of covering the obligation first. While I do not envy his circumstances, he was enriched by the board anyway you look at it.

The board did a good deed for a collector that has/had more issues than most of us. After the poop went down there were less than a handful that retracted their support. And there were something like 140+ donations. That being said I don't disagree with you. As I said, I think it was a very difficult situation. It is one of the most difficult I have had to deal with on the board in over 10 years.

Wymers Auction 07-25-2013 04:57 PM

When you get the BST listing finished remember to add a link to this thread. Sorry about your circumstances, I have been in your shoes.

Gobucsmagic74 07-25-2013 05:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by travrosty (Post 1162850)
If your cup runneth over please help out your neighbor, 5 bucks to paypal, whats the risk? it's hard to ask and it takes humility. ask yourself if it is you next time and you feel like there is no other way what would you like the response to be?

I'd rather donate my $5 to someone who doesn't have a home, much less a computer, internet access, or the ability to ask for money on a message board. I'm not saying this to be coarse or cruel, I'm just being honest.

Peter_Spaeth 07-25-2013 05:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Leon (Post 1162899)
The board did a good deed for a collector that has/had more issues than most of us. After the poop went down there were less than a handful that retracted their support. And there were something like 140+ donations. That being said I don't disagree with you. As I said, I think it was a very difficult situation. It is one of the most difficult I have had to deal with on the board in over 10 years.

And he showed his gratitude by asking that his membership be deleted, no?

thehoodedcoder 07-25-2013 05:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CharleyBrown (Post 1162896)
Brian,

I'd be happy to throw some work your way if you or your wife are decent writers. As long as your wife doesn't mind typing with one hand, the broken wrist shouldn't hinder her from doing the work. The pay isn't tremendous, but it could help you cover at least some of the money you need without relying on donations.

Shaun

do you pay full price on that or is it half pay? LOL!

but that does make an interesting point. there could be a jobs section on the forum where you can post part time or full time help positions. that would be great.

kevin

botn 07-25-2013 06:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Leon (Post 1162899)
The board did a good deed for a collector that has/had more issues than most of us. After the poop went down there were less than a handful that retracted their support. And there were something like 140+ donations. That being said I don't disagree with you. As I said, I think it was a very difficult situation. It is one of the most difficult I have had to deal with on the board in over 10 years.

Not taking anything away from the generosity of the board or saying 140 people were necessarily wrong. Though I feel for his circumstances, let's not sugar coat it and spin it. He was relieved of paying an expense because of the goodness of others and in turn used "his" money that would have otherwise gone to pay that expense, to buy baseball cards. Your post made it sound like he did not reap some financial benefit because he did not get any of the money. Paying the obligation is the same thing as giving him the money directly.

Texxxx 07-25-2013 06:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by botn (Post 1162963)
Not taking anything away from the generosity of the board or saying 140 people were necessarily wrong. Though I feel for his circumstances, let's not sugar coat it and spin it. He was relieved of paying an expense because of the goodness of others and in turn used "his" money that would have otherwise gone to pay that expense, to buy baseball cards. Your post made it sound like he did not reap some financial benefit because he did not get any of the money. Paying the obligation is the same thing as giving him the money directly.

+1

Gobucsmagic74 07-25-2013 06:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Leon (Post 1162899)
The board did a good deed for a collector that has/had more issues than most of us. After the poop went down there were less than a handful that retracted their support. And there were something like 140+ donations. That being said I don't disagree with you. As I said, I think it was a very difficult situation. It is one of the most difficult I have had to deal with on the board in over 10 years.

I wasn't around at the time, but it seems reasonable to assume that the outpouring of support and goodwill for that member may have set a precedent that could lead to this type of situation. This takes nothing away from those who gave then, may choose to do so now, or from this particular members situation. However, having said that, I find it odd that someone with the access to even post on this board would ask for donations before exhausting every possible means available to them to make ends meet, including selling whatever assets they may have.

NewEnglandBaseBallist 07-25-2013 06:55 PM

I am very surprised by some of the mean-spirited responses on this thread. While putting up a thread like this is not ideally the best idea. It takes alot of guts to put yourself out there and ask for help. If some of you don't agree with his approach, then don't help and leave it at that. Making nasty comments and humiliating the guy is unwarranted and classless. I'd like to think this board is better than that.

SushiX37 07-25-2013 07:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NewEnglandBaseBallist (Post 1162982)
I am very surprised by some of the mean-spirited responses on this thread. While putting up a thread like this is not ideally the best idea. It takes alot of guts to put yourself out there and ask for help. If some of you don't agree with his approach, then don't help and leave it at that. Making nasty comments and humiliating the guy is unwarranted and classless. I'd like to think this board is better than that.

With all due respect, this isn't the place for a request like that. That's just my opinion. No offense meant.

Rich

NewEnglandBaseBallist 07-25-2013 07:16 PM

I'm not arguing the wisdom of starting this thread, just some of the responses which seem unecessary to me. If you don't agree with what he's doing then fine, but scolding him like he's a child is wrong. If you don't want to help then don't, but there's no need to kick the guy while he's down.

Rob D. 07-25-2013 07:16 PM

Just to be clear on the subject of the previous member who received a monetary gift from the board: I wasn't criticizing him in any way. I feel that if you give someone a gift, it becomes theirs. You don't retain the right to dictate how the money is used or to play Monday morning quarterback after the gifting has been done.

There simply was some information posted in this thread that implied the member hadn't received any money directly. I attempted to correct that misinformation.

As far as the recipient asking that his membership be deleted, go back and read the thread and ask yourself if you blame him one bit. That period of time was not a good one in Net54 history.

NewEnglandBaseBallist 07-25-2013 07:23 PM

I'm just going on what I read in this thread, I don't know anything about the past situation.

ScottFandango 07-25-2013 07:25 PM

Poor Leon
 
Poor poor Leon......

Hope you have a good bottle of wine handy tonight.....


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