OT - The Real Ultimate Trade-Up

[frankbmd]

Friends and fellow collectors,

I have decided to embark on a journey to improve my capability to deliver any vintage sport cards you may purchase from me in person, call it special delivery if you will. I have decided that the best way to accomplish this goal is to obtain a late model Lamoborghini Huracan.

Lamborghini Huracan.jpg

This will enable me to deliver your cards in a timely manner. The vehicle is equipped with a secure glove compartment for storage of your purchase is transit. This change however will necessitate an elimination of any current listings with the designation of SHIPPING INCLUDED or FREE SHIPPING as a fuel surcharge will be needed to allow for this service. For deliveries to fly over country between the Hudson River and Beverly Hills, it may also be necessary to travel with a certified Lamborghini mechanic should an unforeseen breakdown occur.

Mechanic.jpeg

To finance this proposition I am planning on a series of trades, your car for my car even up, until we reach the goal. My current vehicle was purchased "new" in gem mint condition shown below.

yugo 1-001.jpg

This vehicle, yes it's a Yugo, is a rare collectable in its own right, that was marketed for a short period of time in the 1980s. Poorly engineered, ugly, and cheap, it survived much longer as a punch line for comedians than it did as a vehicle on the roads. The story of how this particular car became the most hated vehicle in the U.S. is a comedy of errors detailed in Jason Vuic’s book, The Yugo: The Rise and Fall of the Worst Car in History. A bewildering array of capitalist hucksters and impoverished communists desperate for revenue collaborated to create the Yugo, and what could have been a great international relations victory of the Cold War was ruined the moment consumers and auto critics actually got to drive it.

Now in the interest of full disclosure and transparency, and as you can imagine, my Yugo is no longer in mint condition. Several years ago a "short" developed in the electrical harness that resulted in a "minor" fire captured below.

yugo 2-001.jpg

Fortunately and to my surprise, enough of my Yugo was not flammable and the car was salvaged by the only remaining Yugoslavian body shop in the country. These motoring artisans completed the restoration only recently and the car is now back on the road.

Due to the lack of any specifications of parts that are no longer available, the car has only limited functionality. It will roll on flat services and does extremely well going downhill. Controlling downhill speed however is problematic.

yugo 3-001.jpg

The book value of this vehicle will not be found in any price guides and as you are well aware, past sales are of limited use in items this rare.

For my initial trade I am looking for either a Chevrolet Corvair, made famous by Ralph Nader in his book, "Unsafe At Any Speed"

corvair.jpeg

or a Ford Pinto (pre-explosion) with an intact rear end and gas tank.

pinto.jpeg

Who knows how many trades it will take to get to my ultimate goal, but i am convinced that the ends justify the means, and I do intend to be mean in these transactions.

Let me know what you have to trade and then I'll sharpen my pencil. Don't worry about test driving the Yugo. I could ship it, but local pickup is preferred, and don't forget to bring a trailer.

I cannot end this without thanking the Net54 community in advance for their enthusiastic participation in this, The Real Ultimate Trade Up.

Let's get 'er done.

Footnotes:

Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.

What's good for the goose is good for the gander.

And what goes around, comes around, with the possible exception of my Yugo.